Wednesday, 15 July 2009

Robot Wars: Help is at Hand

Time for another update on the impending armageddon which will result from the ongoing war between man and machine. Huge Custardy-thanks to Mr Flange of No Fixed Abode who documented this robot sighting at the entrance to a Melbourne train station last week.

Mr Flange also kindly alerted me to the existence of an educational tome entitled How To Survive a Robot Uprising: Tips on Defending Yourself Against the Coming Rebellion by Daniel H Wilson. In this book you will find the answers to common questions such as how do you spot a robot mimicking a human, how to recognize and deactivate a rebel servant robot and how do you evade a swarm of marauding robotic flies? I know these dilemmas keep me awake at night.

The book offers excellent tips such as 'carry around a pair of welder's goggles, as lasers will likely be robot attackers' weapons of choice, and even a weak laser can cause blindness.' Equally 'if a two-legged android gives chase seek out a body of water, as most robots will sink in water or mud and fall through ice.' Sage advice indeed.

You can buy the learned Mr Wilson's book here. Whilst you're waiting for it to arrive (it may not - much of the postal system is automated these days and they're not going to take kindly to pro-human propaganda) remind yoursleves of mechanical madness in this short animation by Eric Joyner. People, not even our doughnuts are safe.

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