Wednesday, 9 June 2010

Intense Feelings of Disappointment

Folks, the argument about fashion retailers making clothes available in sizes that reflect the average woman has been well documented and dissected in the world's media. However here at Mint Custard we are sad to report an even worse trend than Size 0; that of tent intolerance.

For more on this disgusting phenomenon, check out these pictures from a recent trip to the Big W outdoor pursuits section. Look at the size of these tents. Who on Earth can sleep in these? Only tiny people, that's all. Really tiny people. The average Australian woman is a size 14. Do they really expect a size 14 woman to be able to fit into these tents? No, of course they don't - because they don't care about the real people, the normal people - people like you and me. No, they only care about magic tiny people who can fit into their trendy tiny tents... people like Kate Moss and Ruby Rose and Grand Denyer from Channel 7. Boo Big W. Boo to you for supporting this market fascism.

And it's not just tents. Look at these lovely sleeping bags. Duck down, lotsa togs, suitable for temperatures up to minus 10 degrees centigrade. Sounds good huh? Looks nice, right? Well dream on brothers and sisters because unless you fit with the media dictated hiking high set or you're part of the cool camping club, forget it. These tents come in just one size - super fucking small, so unless you're Dannii Minogue you can just ditch those plans for climbing Mount Kosciuszko in comfort and prepare yourself for chilblains and frostbite, you tubby suckers.

As we all know from Rick (the People's Poet) in situations like this there is only one option and that is to write to the lead singer of Echo and the Bunnymen and demand action... So for those equally as incensed as me at this hiking hypocrisy, please contact Mr Echo here...

Mint Custard - bringing back political activism one row of tents at a time.

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