Oh hello you. Well, this is a surprise.
It's me. You know... Mint Custard? I wrote a bunch of stuff and nonsense? You occasionally stumbled upon it? Mostly by accident I'm guessing, but it was still nice. Well, it was for me anyway...
So, how are you? Good I hope. Bloody great, I hope.
This all feels like a very long time ago doesn't it? Almost another life.
Didn't robots threaten our very existence? Didn't I think writing about cooking was a good idea? Wasn't I permanently excited about Daniel Kitson and the Super Furry Animals? Wasn't that when I read books?
It seems such a very long time ago.
A time before Tw*tter and Faceb**k; before 3G and Tumblrs and Instagram and apps and androids and tablets. Well, I suppose they were there, really. But they weren't here.
Now look at me. Facebooking and Twittering like a champion; liking things, retweeting things. Being friends with people. Loads of people. Reading books? Pah and phooey. I have books. I buy books. But read? When would I do that? I have pithy comments to make and crap photographs to tart up on Instagram so I can put them on Facebook. I have several rounds of Words with Friends to get through. Everyday. Plus I just bought a Nintendo Wii,a full 2 years ahead of schedule. Reading book? Imagine. What would Mario and Luigi say?
But I must admit, it's nice this. Being here together again, just us two. Don't you think?
Sure, we won't get any likes and no one will leave any comments. No one will retweet us and the only people who really care are me and you.
But I think I miss that. I miss us. I miss this. Do you? Maybe you do?
What say we try again? Just me and you. We don't have to do much. We can do whatever you want; talk about whatever you like. I'll get overexcited and use bad grammar, and you can roll your eyes and think 'why does he bother?' Just like the old days.
Tell you what, I'll be here again next week. Turn up if you fancy it. Nothing special, just the two of us? Just me and you. Butch and Sundance. The old team.
It's up to you, of course, but I think it might be rather nice.